Ep 225: You Are More Than What Happened to You with Anne Paphitis
Anne Paphitis · October 14, 2026
Interview with Anne Paphitis
Podcast: The Rising Beyond Podcast
October 14, 2026 · 45 min
When you are still dealing with coercive control or post-separation abuse, healing can feel impossible. How do you rebuild a life when the abuse has not completely ended? In this episode, I’m joined by Anne Paphitis, a survivor and life coach joining us from Ireland. We talk…
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About Anne Paphitis
Resilience Coach, Speaker & Personal Reinvention Expert
2019 Began formal coaching trainingFounder Cambridge school for students outside mainstream educationAcquired business Rebuilding a new company
Anne Paphitis builds work from the conviction that life can be rebuilt, even after everything familiar has been stripped away. Born and raised in South Africa, she spent years running a Cambridge school she founded for young people who did not fit into mainstream education - students wrestling with anxiety, bullying, depression or simply falling through the cracks. Watching teenagers who once doubted themselves sit exams, head to university and later return with messages of thanks shaped her belief that change often starts the moment someone finally believes they can do more. A formal coaching course in 2019 gave Anne new tools to work with that same dynamic in adults.
She has reinvented her own life several times: falling unexpectedly in love with Ireland, emigrating, and more recently selling her school and buying another business she is rebuilding. Those lived pivots - the uncertainties, the practical choices and the tiny steps that rekindled hope - are the material of her work.
She is drawn to conversations that lift people out of survival mode and help them reconnect with purpose, confidence and simple joy. Anne prefers dialog and human connection to one-way advice. She loves being onstage or in conversation because she feeds off other people’s energy and watches them leave with a small but real shift.
About this episode
When you are still dealing with coercive control or post-separation abuse, healing can feel impossible. How do you rebuild a life when the abuse has not completely ended?
In this episode, I’m joined byAnne Paphitis, a survivor and life coach joining us from Ireland. We talk about how she found moments of joy while she was still in her marriage and continued rebuilding herself through the fallout that followed.
Anne shares the small but intentional choices that helped her remember she was more than what she was experiencing. From using her grandmother’s special glasses every day to trying new classes and reconnecting with creativity, she learned to create parts of her life that the abuse did not get to define.
In this episode, we discuss:
Finding times when it is safe to feel safeCreating a mental container for what you cannot address right nowRemembering who you are outside of the abuseUsing small rituals to bring beauty and meaning back into your lifeLearning to trust your choices againTrying new things without making every wrong fit mean something about youWhy healing does not require the abuse to disappear completelyThe power of community and being around people who reflect the good parts of you back to youYou are not only a survivor. Even if you are still living with the fallout, you can begin discovering who you are, what you enjoy, and what you want the next part of your life to include.
Connect w/ Anne
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anne-paphitis-066443116/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/1CuP8BgfVe/
Website: https://www.contoura-collective.co.uk/
About Anne:
Anne Paphitis believes that life can be rebuilt, even after everything familiar has been stripped away. Born and raised in South Africa, Anne founded and ran a Cambridge school for young people who didn’t fit into mainstream education — students navigating anxiety, bullying, depression, and self-doubt. Watching them rediscover confidence, succeed academically, and later return to share their stories shaped her belief that transformation often begins when someone believes they are capable of more.
After completing formal coaching training in 2019, Anne expanded her work to help adults navigate change, resilience, and personal reinvention. Having rebuilt her own life several times — from moving countries, falling in love with Ireland, selling her school, and taking on a new business venture — she brings a deeply personal understanding of uncertainty, courage, and starting again.
Anne’s coaching focuses on resilience, midlife reinvention, emotional wellbeing, and finding purpose through practical, meaningful steps. As a podcast guest, she brings warmth, honesty, and curiosity to conversations about rebuilding confidence, embracing change, and taking the first small step toward a more fulfilling life.
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