The grief of dementia starts before goodbye

Anticipatory Grief in Dementia Care: Naming the ongoing grief caregivers carry through memory loss, role changes and care home decisions.

What if the hardest part of losing someone to dementia isn't when they die - but everything you lose while they're still alive?

For Cassie, the grief she experienced while her mum was living with Alzheimer’s was, in many ways, harder than the grief she experienced after her mum died.

And yet, this kind of grief is rarely spoken about or even recognised.

The day her mum could no longer put her own shoes on. The conversations that stopped making sense.The memories that disappeared. The changing relationship between mother and daughter. The agonising decision to move her mum into permanent care.

This is living grief: mourning the gradual loss of the person you know, their independence, your relationship with them and the life you once shared, while still loving and caring for them every day.

That is a reality many dementia caregivers experience but rarely have the words to explain.

Through her own story, her book I’ve Lost My Mum and her work raising awareness of dementia, Cassie gives a voice to those invisible losses - the grief that happens in the care home visits, the forgotten conversations, the tiny changes that break your heart and the moments that seem insignificant to everyone else but stay with you forever.

This is a powerful conversation about the side of dementia that isn't talked about enough: the grief of losing someone in pieces while they are still here.

Because sometimes, the hardest goodbye isn't the moment they die. It's all the goodbyes you have to say along the way.

Living grief: mourning a mum with dementia who is still here
Author Cassie Welford explains why the grief families carry while a parent lives with dementia deserves to be seen and named.
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About Cassie Welford

Helping experts turn their expertise and stories into powerful conversations that build connection, credibility and authority.

9 Published books500+ Five-star book reviewsBBC Morning Live Featured sharing her mum's Alzheimer's journey2014 First book published

Cassie Welford is a multi-published author, keynote speaker and strategy specialist who helps people connect through conversation, share their stories and become known for the message within them.

A nine-time published author with more than 500 five-star book reviews, Cassie has built her career around storytelling, publishing, speaking and creating meaningful conversations. After closing her author-mentoring business, she moved into the podcast industry, working with a podcast agency and developing her expertise in strategy, storytelling and thought leadership.

Cassie is an experienced keynote speaker who has spoken multiple times on BBC Radio and has been featured in both local and national press. She understands how to take the experiences, knowledge and ideas someone has and turn them into stories and conversations that create trust, credibility and genuine connection.

Her passion is helping people move from having a story to becoming known for the message within it - using conversation to build visibility and authority without losing the human story behind the expertise.

Cassie is also a passionate advocate for dementia and Alzheimer’s awareness, following the loss of her mum to Alzheimer’s disease. Through her book I’ve Lost My Mum, speaking and sharing her own experiences, she continues to raise awareness of the realities faced by families and caregivers.

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The grief of dementia starts before goodbye

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