Masculinity, Emotion, and Why “Be Nice” Is the Hardest Part of Recovery

Severn was raised by a father who didn’t speak and a community that confused presence with affection. Sobriety didn’t just mean quitting alcohol-it meant learning how to feel, express, and sit with emotions he’d long buried. He shares how recovery challenged his inherited ideas of masculinity, forcing him to connect with tenderness, vulnerability, and self-compassion. And while abstaining from alcohol was a clear line to draw, being genuinely kind to himself-without numbing or performing-proved to be the hardest work of all.

About Severn Lang

Severn Lang, podcast guest

Creative Recovery Advocate Raising Awareness of Everyday Addiction

12 years sober Long-term recovery grounded in lived experienceAward-winning Best Iowa Short Filmmaker at the 2020 Spring Grove International Film FestivalEagle Scout Earned the Boy Scouts’ highest rank at age 16Playwright & filmmaker Creative practice

Severn Lang helps people see addiction for what it really is: not just a battle with substances, but the quiet, everyday ways we hold on when we should be letting go. Whether it’s staying in the wrong relationship, clinging to clutter tied to old grief, or numbing with digital distractions, Severn invites listeners to recognise their own patterns—and meet them with honesty, humour, and compassion.

Severn’s journey includes experiencing both active addiction and periods of homelessness, even during his first year of long-term sobriety. He openly shares the extremes of his addiction during interviews when it’s relevant, helping listeners understand the realities of substance abuse — and showing what’s possible on the other side.

Now twelve years sober, Severn draws from both lived experience and creative practice to explore what recovery looks like beyond the AA room. His work is grounded, reflective, and rooted in a belief that healing doesn’t require perfection, just presence. Working with his extreme dyslexia has been a daily challenge, but it has also taught him creative problem-solving techniques and new ways of thinking, fueling his determination to keep trying until he finds solutions.

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